There is nothing quite as nerve-racking as walking up to the stage to expose your every weakness, physical and mental, before an audience who is all too familiar with the repertoire. You think you will make a mistake, then you do, and everybody knows when it happened.
“Much of my work as a virtual assistant involves social media these
days. Initially, this was much easier for me to handle as an
(extreme) introvert. Strangely enough, I find that as friend counts
climb and the volume of online communication grows, I react with the
same sense of overwhelm, stress and exhaustion as I do to live or
phone communications. Have you heard this from others?”, she asks.
If you’re intimidated at the prospect of a networking encounter, focus your attention on what’s important to the person you’re meeting. Your ability to listen and tune in to the other person will make a positive impression – and if the other person is an extrovert, you’ll be creating an opportunity for the extrovert to do what extroverts enjoy most – to talk!
Chill out. In meetings, conversations, and even casual chats, slow down and give your introverts time to reflect and respond. Put space between your questions—counting “1…2…3” in your head if you have to—and avoid what most introverts perceive as a cross-examination.
When do you come up with your most creative ideas? If you are like me, it is NOT when you are sitting in meetings or parked on conference calls. .” All this forced collaboration gives us little time to pause and reflect. More likely, you are driving in the car, running on the treadmill, spacing out in the shower or even awake in the middle of the night. Introverted leaders embrace solitude and are energized by spending time alone.
More validation for introverted leaders playing to their strengths. In the Sunday NY Times piece “Rah Rah Isn’t For Everyone” Adam Bryant interviews introverted leader Jilly Stephens, Executive Director…
Fast forward a bit. I am sitting with Sam, a new executive coaching client. A bright, ivy league introverted guy who is managing people for the first time. He shares some feedback about being seen as too intense and intimidating.
I asked him to breathe. Sam squirmed in his chair but consciously took in air and let it out. I asked him to do it more slowly, more deliberately. We even breathed a few breaths at the same time. I encouraged Sam to check in with himself. “How do you feel?”, I asked. “Calmer,” he replied.
Clapton grew up an introvert. He spent many hours alone with his guitar dealing with a rough childhood, honing his gift. Later on he battled alcohol and drugs. None of that mattered last night.
At a recent book signing, Sheri, an introverted training manager, told me she holds onto an image from nature to comfort her when she feels overpowered by extroverted team members. As…
